I feel like I'm drowning.
My house is a mess, I have so many projects out and half done (adding to the chaos), party planning for my mother is moving along with more things on my to do list, I have several dates coming up on my calendar with an assignment for me attached to each of them -- I was so desparate this morning that I actually cancelled schoolwork for the day in order for us all to work and gain some control over the raging white waters that my life seems to be right now.
Then the phone rang. . . . . It was the dentists' office asking if we were coming in for our appointments this morning. Of. Course.
The children run to get dressed while I can't find my keys. Looking, looking, I'm about to give up and call back to cancel when on the way to the phone I spy my keys laying on the bed where they blend in beautifully with the comforter. Get. In. The. Car. Now.
We arrive one person short. My Angel is in school two cities away. Because I totally forgot about the appointment. We go to the dentist en masse so that we only have to make one trip and because we all like to visit with the dentist and his wife who works as the dental hygenist twice a week. (We always schedule on her days.) Everyone is so sweet when we get there - no "You're Late" looks or anything. And Mrs. Dentist, who is the only one who cleans Angels teeth, makes room in her schedule so that she can see him tomorrow.
I'm first with Mrs. Dentist while the boys head off to the room across the hall with another hygenist. It's the first quiet I've had all morning, sitting in the chair while she finishes setting up, the children are all across the hall watching Meerkat Manor while younger son gets his teeth cleaned. What do I do? I start crying. Yup. Right in the dentists chair with Mrs. Dentist hovering and flitting and chatting.
Do you know what happened next?
She asked if she could pray with me. Yes. Please. A moment of calm and peace and the sharing of a burden. What a treasure. She shared from her heart exactly what I was thinking in mine - life gets frustrating and overwhelming when we try to do it within our own power and do not seek time and direction from the LORD.
I was able to breathe again - to just simply take a deep breath and let it go - the mess, the projects, the list, the dates - everything. Just sit and breathe and not worry about the next moment. The LORD holds all in his hands. Ten minutes ago is past. I can't change it. Ten minutes from now is the future. The only thing I control about the future is how I approach it.
The most important moment of your life is the one you're living right now.
Thank you LORD for a life ring in the storm and a reminder that I need to choose to seek you every moment. Seek ye the LORD while he may be found; call ye upon him while he is near. Isaiah 55:6